Sexual denial as a means of punishment; how reasonable?

One of the various reasons God ordained marriage is for sexual enjoyment aside this; it is the first step to procreation. And for both male and female, your partner deserves an unreserved right to ‘you and yours’ — your body at anytime. Why then do women use sexual denial as a means of getting back at their husbands? How do men feel about it and is it right for a woman to use this as a weapon to get back at her husband? 

MARRIAGE is the coming together of two - man and woman to become one. Becoming one means you both have equal rights to each other and there must be no holding back on anything.

Either we like it or not, the issue of sex, like money is very crucial to every marriage, and a marriage where sexual experience and pleasure is absent, it is as good as through.

Sex is the uttermost intimacy in marriage and more often than not, most couples settle their differences easily after a good sexual experience. According to a woman who shared her experience, she recounted that the time she has the most fulfilling sexual experience with her husband is when they’ve had an argument or are quarrelling. “At night, it is like we are reassuring each other and re-pledging our love for each other. It’s always a sweet experience. Mind you, I am not saying I enjoy quarrelling with my husband but the essence is that sex is a type of bonding between husband and wife.”

This is true, couples who have sex all the time remain close, the intimacy is unequalled and sex is a way of expressing your feelings to each other more than words can.

A couple whose sex life is not what it should be must surely be going through some difficult times; it doesn’t have to be financial, emotional problem more often than not could be responsible for this. If there are no problems, physically, emotionally and health wise is it good for a woman to deny her husband sex as a means of punishing him for one offence or the other? Respondents have these to say:

Luke Stephanie, Nurse: “A woman who because she’s quarrelling with her husband or annoyed with him, decides to deny him sex is digging the grave of her marriage. There are many ways to show your man you are not happy with him, withholding sex is not a good one at all. It is the way of giving the man an excuse or a reason to go out and date other women. If he goes out and tastes another woman, who adores him after a good sexual experience, then you have reached the waterloo of your marriage. So, under no circumstance must a woman deny her husband sex for any reason. 
Louise Miller, Teacher: “Why won’t I deny him sex? If that is the only way I can get at him? You don’t know these men, there is no point trying to displease yourself to please them. Whatever you do, even if it entails gnashing your teeth because you are feeling uncomfortable with his love making, it does not change the fact that if he is the type of man that cheats. So if denying him till eternity is what will make you feel better, why not go ahead and satisfy yourself? Enough of trying to please these men, why don’t you do what makes you feel good for once

Edward Cook, Banker: “I will feel concerned if my wife does this. Beatrice is not the type of woman who would think of a thing like this on a good day. I’ll take time to find out what’s on her mind. If you are a man who loves your wife, ignoring her or cheating on her isn’t the best. Also, you should not try to force her as this may amount to rape.”

Mari Antonio, Designer: “No sane woman will do that. Why should you deny yourself the pleasure and the fulfillment of love making? If you cannot iron things out during the process, try to do so afterwards, there is nothing a woman cannot take from a man who is sexually fulfilled and satisfied.

Giovanni Casanova, Printer: “My wife isn’t gonna do that, She loves me. That is sexual unjust.”

Eunice Rodriguez, Psychologist: “It is a statement of fact that you don’t share your body with someone you are not happy with. It will be fallacious to assume that sex denial is the extension of quarrels. Some ladies just don’t like sex and when they are annoyed, it aggravates their hatred or dislike for sexual intercourse. Hence, with little annoyance from their spouse, they switch off. It then becomes his duty to make sure she is pacified.”

Rebecca Smiths, Business woman:” I love sex, I don’t joke with it, and since I am not ready to go elsewhere or outside my marriage to seek sexual pleasure, I won’t deny my man. On a good day when he wants it, will I say I am annoyed and deny not only him but myself too? I’m not gonna do that I will forget my pride first and have a nice time, afterwards we settle the quarrel. The best time to take anything from your man or make him give you an apology from his heart is when he’s on top of you and on top of the world, at that moment, a man will do anything.”

Marjorie Valencio, Secretary: “This is a two way issue; first, it is not good for a wife to deny her husband sex. What about the woman’s feelings? Are we saying that the woman feelings do not matter? The moment a woman grudgingly gives herself to her man, she feels cheated psychologically. She doesn’t feel alright.”
You’ve read the comments hmm......... What do you think? Honestly, sex denial is not a good weapon to express annoyance. It is not good for your health; make sure you don’t go to bed with any hard feelings against your husband, yourself, your kids, neighbors, colleagues etc. This may rob you of a good sleep.

Sex is good for you; nothing should stop you from having it at anytime. Take a bold step if you feel like it, initiate it, and don’t always wait for your husband to make the first move.

A word of advice, don’t take any excuse from him either, once it’s not on health basis, if you can’t deny him, he has no right to deny you. If there is anything bothering you, go on your knees, pray about it and all will be well, don’t deny yourself the opportunity of great sex. It’s good for your system.

Bamidele O.